#122 - Want to Want It: How to Rebuild Desire and Deepen Connection with Dr. Diane Mueller
In this powerful and eye-opening episode of The Personal Success Podcast, Ryan Watts sits down with Dr. Diane Mueller, also known as The Libido Doctor — a double doctorate, board-certified sexologist, author of the upcoming book Want to Want It, and a leading voice in helping long-term couples reclaim intimacy, connection, and desire.
This conversation dives into the science, psychology, and real-life dynamics behind desire — why it fades, how it changes, and what create lasting passion in long-term relationships.
Whether you’re in a committed partnership, seeking deeper intimacy, or simply want to understand how desire works… this is a must-listen.
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In This Episode, You’ll Learn:
• What the 2023 Harvard study uncovered about relationships and long-term happiness
• Why desire fades in long-term relationships and what actually drives it
• The chemistry of dopamine, novelty, and excitement
• The surprising difference between desire and arousal
• Why mismatched desire is normal — and fixable
• How to talk about intimacy without triggering shame or shutdown
• The role of stress, hormones, pelvic floor health, and circulation
• How couples can create intentional space to reconnect
• What causes “low desire” (the real reasons, not the myths)
• Practical tips to reignite desire — even with limited time, kids, or exhaustion
• Why sex and intimacy are core pillars of a successful, fulfilling life
This episode is grounded in research, full of actionable insights, and delivered with deep compassion for what couples face in the real world.
About Dr. Diane Mueller
Dr. Diane Mueller is on a mission to improve one million relationships by helping couples understand desire, pleasure, and connection through science-based, shame-free education. She brings decades of work in relationships, intimacy, and human connection — as well as her own personal story — to transform how couples think about and experience intimacy.
Explore her work and resources here:
• Her book Want to Want It:
https://wanttowantit.com
• Free intimacy resources, downloads, and tools:
https://havehotsex.com
• Yes/No/Maybe Checklist and more:
https://mysexdoc.com
Links Mentioned in This Episode
• Dr. Diane’s Book — Want to Want It
https://wanttowantit.com
• Dr. Diane’s Free Downloads & Resources
https://havehotsex.com
• Yes/No/Maybe Checklist
https://mysexdoc.com
• The Personal Success Planner (Free 7-Day PDF)
https://personalsuccessplanner.com
• Listen to all episodes of The Personal Success Podcast
https://thepersonalsuccesspodcast.com
• Subscribe on YouTube for full episodes and shorts
https://youtube.com/@thepersonalsuccesspodcast
Work With Ryan
If today’s conversation opened something for you — clarity, curiosity, or the desire to create more intention in your life — you can take the next step:
Download the Personal Success Planner (free):
https://personalsuccessplanner.com
Schedule a complimentary Define & Refine Session:
https://ryanwattslifecoaching.com/defineandrefine
